5.12 Glad I guess

Location: My apartment, sitting at the table on my laptop

Time: 11:30 AM, missed my chance to go to church this morning, but at least I made breakfast

Mood (1 to 10, 10 = fantastic, 1 = absolutely horrible): 4, maybe

Last Meal: I made pancakes (but they were so thin that they were more like crepes, haha)

Current level of exercise: sedentary

Meds:

-Adderall: 10mg just now

-Prozac: my 60mg when I woke up at 5am realizing I hadn't taken it the night before

-Coffee: 2nd cup

General schedule of the day: so far I've just diddled around but I'm being creative and I've cooked food so that's admirable

Objective: I want to be motivated instead of just feeling how cold it is in here and not wanting to do anything. I want my Adderall to kick in and do something for me.

Dump Zone: 

ehhh.....

What's the GLAD thing again? *looks it up*

Gratitude

Learning

Achieved

Delighted

Gratitude - I'm grateful for these two days off. (I don't need to focus on the fact that I've been wanting to have this chance to spend the weekend days with Alex for a long time, but this weekend had to be the one week Alex was out of town.)

Learning - Yesterday when I went to Kayla's bridal shower, I came up with ideas for things to add to our registry, and I also got motivated to work on making decisions about the bridesmaid dresses.

Achieved - I polished up a bunch of GarageBand tracks that I haven't really touched in months. That was pretty cool, and it was fun to just jump from one to another after I got bored of one.

Delighted - I played Pokemon (the Let's Go Pikachu game on my Nintendo Switch) and I caught a new Oddish! He was one of the first ones I caught, and I love his moves, but my original one evolved and I don't like what he evolved into, haha.....Gloom is a sad exchange for the cuteness of Oddish. So I caught a new one and put him in daycare (they level up there without you having to use them in your party, it's cool, I put a Kakuner in there and he went from, like, level 3 to level 14 in the weeks that I left him there.) 

***

I want to start writing again. Like, fiction writing. That was a really good outlet for me in high school and when I'd work on it in college, and I want to try to see what I can make now that I'm busy with work, but wanting to have something to invest myself in.
Sure, wedding planning is kind of more important, but if I have something I'm interested in, it'll be that mood boost that helps me get motivated to do other things. YouTube binging hasn't really been fulfilling that role.

4.18 Cramps can be motivating?

April 18, 2019
GLAD

Gratitude: Something I am grateful for

Learning: Something I learned about myself, my job duties, my brain etc

Achieved: Something I got done or accomplished on my own

Delighted: Something that gave me joy

Gratitude - Yesterday would have been rough without ibuprofen -- my period started in the middle of my work shift and my cramps were so bad. But ibuprofen was a godsend. Helped me make it through the day with a smile -- even if the smile was a devious, I-hate-you-female-hormones-and-I-will-not-let-you-win smile.

Learning - I learned that some kids (Stevie [a cute girls name hehe] and a guy who's at least queer if not gay) didn't know I was engaged, and i got to show them my ring, and pictures of my dress, and talk about my colors and themes and stuff :) I learned that it's fun to find new people to gush to about wedding stuff.

Achieved - I made it through the fricking shift!! I even stayed, like, 7 minutes longer in the kitchen, to put things in order for the unlucky cooks who would end up having to close without a dishwasher because Lorenzo didn't show up on time. Again.

Delighted - I got home after my shift and sat down on the couch in comfy pajamas and with my warm beanbag. I dipped some of the last of my chocolate cookie bars in a glass of milk, and I read the last 7 chapters of The Great Hunt, the second book in the Wheel of Time series that Alex and I are reading. He's already in the 5th book but I'll catch up. :) Maybe. xP but yeah the ending to the book was incredible and I just loved it!

Posting GLAD reviews of my days

So I'm going to be posting the daily reflection write-ups here, and hopefully it'll email the updates to Neila, but if not I'll just email her the link each time. I wrote one for Thursday I think. I need to do one for yesterday now. Okay. :)

4-9: Mild panic over time is still panic

Location: Home (my apartment) on the couch

Time: 8:15 PM, the sun has set and I've started turning on some lights so that I'm not in the dark

Mood (1 to 10, 10 = fantastic, 1 = absolutely horrible): 3

Last Meal: I had cereal (crumbs from the honey oat bunches, and then a little bit of quaker's oat squares), and then was still hungry so I ate a pear that I bought yesterday at Kroger

Current level of exercise: I've done my share of standing, lifting, walking, etc in the kitchen.

Meds:

-Adderall: 20 mg taken at 9:35 AM

-Prozac: 60 mg taken last night at 9:30 PM

-Coffee: made regular coffee, poured water to the 4-c line and it was like 2 cups of coffee

General schedule of the day: I left and got to work on time before 10 AM, day was fine, but music in the kitchen was just overwhelming from all the sources mixing and just the stupid EDM stuff Owen was playing, I left at 4:40 after having tried coping and feeling like I just needed to get away

Objective: I'm here to write what happened so I can share it with Neila

Dump Zone:

My tongue hurts. After I got home at like 5:30, and I wrote my D&D group on Discord about how I realized that every Tuesday it was something at work that ruined my day (or that I let ruin my day, whatever)....you know, I should just copy & paste what I wrote because it made more sense.

My D&D character is named Analaigh and that's why my name wasn't 'Ashley'...Octavia is a friend I met only through Discord through this campaign, 'Caefer' is the dungeon master, Caleb, who I know in person because he's my friend Kayla's fiancee :D and yeah it felt better to tell them than to vaguely describe that I needed time and/or a nap like I had the last few sessions after getting home from work in a frazzle and a fizz.